Welcome back once again to Damage Inc. Theatre. Todays tale is an epic adventure . But would you expect any less for Damage Inc.s leader Cooldude and famed brutal warrior Emperor James? A simple haiku wouldnt do them justice.
*Pauses to open the book
Let us begin with a third of the tale, shall we?
*He begins to read:
COOLDUDE AND EMPEROR JAMES: THE EPIC NOVELLETTE
Prelude to the Story:
Daddy! Theyre getting closer! cried Abigail as her six year-old arms were wrapped tightly around his neck.
Bill Days held his girl close to his body as his legs pumped like pistons. He was trying his hardest not to trip on any branches or small plants on the forest floor. With every hard step, the twigs on the ground crackled and crunched.
Bill pushed through low tree branches and stubborn bushes, praying silently to himself that the danger had somehow been lost through the thicket of trees.
He looked back for one second and his fear, like a winter frost, glazed over and killed any hope in his heart.
The black wraiths were still coming. Their feet were secluded under their long, flowing garments and they moved like shadows from candlelight.
Daddy Im scared, said Abigail as she buried her face into the collar of his red flannel shirt.
Bills legs were starting to tire. The chase had been long and the forest had been uncooperative. Low branches of small young trees whipped at his jeans and poked at his daughters blonde pig-tailed head. One branch had even tore a hole on the side of her favorite yellow dress.
And Bill felt nothing but terror.
Suddenly a cold, long hand reached out and grabbed his shoulder. For a hand that looked like that of a wrinkled old mans, it possessed a terrible strength. The grip was so strong that Bill was jerked back and his daughter went tumbling out of his arms and onto the forest ground.
She lay still like a doll among the leaves and grass.
The wraith spun Bill around and stood before him.
Bill looked up at the creature in its black, hooded shroud. Its long thin body and twiggy arms were still next its body. In its concealing hood were two glowing lights in the shape of eyes.
The eyes were a haunting blue.
The wraith had with it two others; one with green and one with pink eyes. They all stood at well over seven feet tall.
Abigail slowly sat up and shook her head to make the world stop spinning. When she looked up, she saw her father before the ghastly trio.
Leave him alone! she wailed.
The blue-eyed wraith reached inside his shroud. Its hand gripped the short handle of a weapon that looked like an ice pick with a long flat, serrated blade.
Bill did not even have a chance to plead for his daughters life because as soon as he opened his mouth, the blue-eyed wraith swiped at his face and shredded the flesh of his cheeks that is between his jaws.
Bill dropped to his knees and cupped his bloody mouth that was searing with pain. He looked up once more at the towering creature.
Abigail, who was still sitting, saw her fathers head slide off his neck after the blue-eyed wraith had made his final slash.
Bills body fell forward, had a few brief spasms among the twigs and leaves and then was still.
Unlike her father, young Abigail held her eyes closed when the wraiths made their way over to her.
She didnt feel a thing when the blade sliced cleanly through her tender neck.
Bill and Abigail were among the first two casualties in a long and bloody war that had not been declared yet in the huge island of Hie Brasil. But word would spread.
Word would most definitely spread.
Chapter 1, Glimpse at a Leader
Cooldude was the head honcho of the clan known as Damage Inc. in mainland Dragon Court.
He was not your average figurehead.
Cooldude couldnt lift a monstrous granite boulder over his head with one hand nor cast fantastic spells to make people shrink to the size of ants to be stepped on. He was something far more special.
He was a natural leader who through his kind heart and open mind had won the trust and respect of his people. Cooldude was the kind of leader that always put his people first in his list of priorities and today was no different except for the grave situation at hand.
His clan, Damage Inc., may be going to war against an unknown enemy.
Chapter 2, The Meeting
Cooldude sat on his chair before a large square wooden table in the throne room of Damage Inc.s castle. Cooldude was not a leader who like high thrones on fancy stone stands. He liked talking to people eye to eye.
There were several torch stands set up around the room and large blue tapestries hung down along the gray stone walls. They had designs of black dragons in flight on them.
Cooldude ran his tan hands through his blonde, curly hair as he collected his thoughts before his most important speech. His indigo eyes looked at the faces of his high-ranking officers at the table and the dozens of warriors gathered in the room.
Cooldude then cast a glance at Drakulon, his co-leader who was sitting to his left and then at well-known warrior Emperor James, who was on his right.
Cooldude took a deep breath and stood up. The chains on his brigadine jingled a little.
I asked for you all here because of news in Hie Brazil. Yes, it is an island many miles from us but the danger there stands a very good chance of coming here. We cannot allow that to happen, said Cooldude.
He reached down and picked up a silver goblet of red DragonWyne and took a sip to wet his lips. Cooldude didnt like the proposal he was about to bring up next but knew it had to be done.
I have heard of great death in Hie Brasil. Traders bring stories of strange, black cloaked creatures appearing in the far north that are slaughtering entire families. At first it was just a few incidents but now it is turning into a bloodbath, said Cooldude.
He paused to let his words sink in.
Cooldude said, Word has it that the wraiths are growing in numbers and are starting to push their way south in Hie Brasil to overrun the population. What then I ask you? I know and you know it is only a matter of time before they try to do the same over here. What should we do? I also think you know the answer.
A low mumble went around the table.
Cooldude trusted his fellow clans folk enough to know they were not going to turn down his proposal to fight. But he could not blame them for being just a little apprehensive about going into a battle with so many things unknown.
Cooldude raised his hands.
I know you have questions as do I. Tonight I hope we find some answers, said Cooldude as he nodded to Gepfar who was seated at the other end of the table.
Gepfar was a muscularly tone man with a mane of black hair and was dressed in faded brown leather armor. He was the clan armorer and expert sailor of all ships great and small.
By the request of Cooldude, Gepfar and a handful of soldiers set sail on a small ship to Hie Brasil a week ago to find a rarity. A survivor of the wraith attacks.
The clan armorer was true to his word when he said hed be back in ten days with what Cooldude wanted. The weather was pleasant during his journey but it made little difference because if hell itself had a river, Gepfar could sail on it.
Cooldude sat as Gepfar stood to address his clan. As soon as the armorer stood, he pointed to a scrawny bald man wearing tattered maroon clothes seated next to him.
This is Jack. We found him hiding in a corner of a forest in the far north of Hie Brasil. He can tell you better of conditions there, said Gepfar as he sat.
Chapter 2, Details of the Massacre
Jack, poor Jack, shrank in his chair because of the painful memories of what he had seen in his homeland. The young man talked about how there was a range of mountains in northern Hie Brasil that ran in a huge ring for several hundreds of miles.
In the middle of the ring of mountains was a giant lush plain with occasional forests but many settlements of people wanting to live in peace.
The spacious plain in Hie Brasil was called Gods Palm.
Normally a utopia, Gods Palm has been more of a butchers block as of late.
The wraiths appear during the day out of no where. They kill everything, even livestock. In fact, that is how I survived. They were murdering my small town when I ran into the fields where my cattle were. I caused a stampede and through some miracle I managed to make my way through the cattle while the wraiths were swept away. And then I ran, like a coward leaving my wife and two sons behind, said Jack with a lump in his throat.
Jack started to shake uncontrollably out of fear.
Babes, a demonic angel with green eyes, light green angels wings and perhaps the strongest warrior of Damage Inc, placed a hand on the unfortunate mans shoulder to comfort him.
Cooldude stood again.
None of the traders I have talked to have ever seen a wraith outside of Gods Palm. I think the wraiths are most likely not halfway through the northern part of the vast plain yet. I think if we leave in two days, we should meet them just as they are reaching the middle of it. And then the fate of the world rests on our shoulders, said Cooldude.
Emperor James, known for his fiery temper, laid a black metal gauntlet covered fist on the table to make the room jump.
Emperor James stood up next to his leader. His dark red cloak billowed around his black armor with the golden ivy design seemingly from the devils garden. Over his face was a dark metal mask that resembled the Grim Reaper in a furious rage. It was streaked with stains from the blood of his numerous enemies.
He drew from his sheath his glowing blue katana that he uses to control his blue dragon, Damien, which sleeps hidden in the Fenris Mountains in mainland Dragon Court.
Warriors! shouted the maestro of the battlefield We must do this for our friends! We must do this for our families! We must do this for honor and for the sake of the kingdom! Most of all we must do this because we are Damage Inc. and we back down from NO ONE!
A rousing roar erupted in the throne room. Members of Damage Inc. were drawing their swords and maces and holding them up high. They truly wanted to go.
Cooldude had to pound his goblet on the table to regain control of the room.
Fine! Fine! It is decided then. I cannot say how proud I am of all of you. We leave in two days. That gives Emperor James enough time to ready his legions to march into battle and enough time for Gepfar to ready our armada, said Cooldude.
More applause came from the brave warriors.
And then Cooldude added,
And Im coming with you.
The applause trickled down to uneasy silence.
Emperor James leaned over and said quietly, But sir, with all due respect. Youre far too important to put on the battlefield. We need you alive and well. Your people wouldnt approve of this.
Cooldude clapped his friend on a shoulder and addressed the room.
The people of Damage Inc. stand by me because I stand by them. It would be an insult to them and a disgrace to my position if I didnt go. So please, no arguing. When the wave of wraiths come, Ill be there with my sword waiting to strike at evils cold, wretched heart.
Cooldude then turned to Drakulon, the hippie co-leader of Damage Inc. for the final piece of business.
Chapter 3, Final Orders
Cooldude said told Drakulon that he will leave him in total control of Damage Inc. while he is away.
Drakulon, a great Dragonian man of magery was an unusual being. He had silver and gray skin, golden eyes, long, shocking white hair and two wings that looked like a cross between those of a dragon or a great white bat.
If something should happen where we dont return, do everything in your power to protect the children and elderly of our clan. Dont let the wraiths get inside our castle. Defend our people, dear friend, said Cooldude.
Drakulon, wearing a psychedelic wizards robe and silver peace sign on a chain, simply looked up and smiled with serenity. He was unshakable.
Even in the toughest of times he was the coolest of cool cats in a frenzied wolf den world. The people of Damage Inc. looked up to the mysterious mage for that reason among so many others to admire him for.
That goes without saying, man. You and EJ go take care of business and Ill keep the seat warm until you get back, said Drakulon.
Cooldude shook his hand. It was settled.
Lords and ladies, Damage Inc. is going to war. The next time I see you all, well be in Hie Brasil. Emperor James will give you your orders. Good night and God speed, said Cooldude.
Meanwhile, Jack, the Hie Brasil survivor, still could not stop trembling out of fear as he sat among the warriors that were planning to do battle with the creatures that will haunt his memory for the rest of his life.
Chapter 5, The Journey
The water was clear and rocked the ships gently as they carried Damage Inc.s warriors en route to Hie Brasil.
Would you look at that! Ive never seen such a sight and Ive traveled the world several times over! shouted Gepfar as he stood on the bow of the lead galleon of Damage Inc.s armada.
Cooldude looked over to where Gepfar was pointing. Off in the distance behind Damage Inc.s ships was fleet after fleet of other ships coming as one huge wave. Banners of different clans flew high and proud. Cooldude wore a pair of brass binoculars around his neck. He peered through them and could see that almost every clan, great or small, had sent soldiers to fight the black menace as well.
Gepfar turned his gaze ahead to the green paradise under siege; Hie Brasil.
Were making great time on our journey. It is only a matter of hours now. I bet by tomorrow, well be in Gods Palm and in the fight of our lives. I cannot wait, said Gepfar.
Emperor James, who was standing with his friends, laughed heartily.
An adventure like this comes only once in a mans life. Twice if he is lucky. Savor these moments friend. Here is the place where legends are born, said the young emperor.
Emperor James shielded his eyes with his right hand has he looked up in the sky and could see his blue dragon Damien high in the clouds, following him on the ship.
Cooldude lowered his binoculars from gazing at the other ships, gave his friends a smile and headed to the captains cabin alone.
Cooldude sat down and grabbed his sword off a table. He picked up a sharpening stone on the table and decided to fine-tune his weapon.
Looks like it is time to add my legend to this family heirloom, said Cooldude as he worked on the edges of the great silver broadsword.
He sharpened the blade in a quiet meditation until a cry went out on deck.
LAND HO!
*The camera fades out the scene and shows Darkreverend again in his study as he closes the book. He speaks:
Well, we have met the heroes and the enemy. I cannot wait to see what happens when they meet each other in the next installment of Cooldude and Emperor James adventure. And will trouble find Drakulon back home? That is a question that will have to wait until another night.
*camera fades as music plays..
~D.
DI
(Part Two coming real soon!)



